Monday, December 7, 2009

Lists...

I have a new friend. She and I are due pretty close to the same time (she's a bit further along than I am). She is a pretty big fan of lists (as am I...), and has compiled a couple pregnancy lists I just LOVED. So of course, I felt the need to take her lists, share them here, and add a few to them (my additions are in red and italics). Now, on to the lists!


(in no particular order)

The best things about pregnancy
1. Feeling like I always have a secret... something that is temporarily all mine and no one else's.
2. My boobs get bigger :)
3. Strangers seem much more kind and courteous
4. Being able to use pregnancy as an excuse to con strangers into being more kind and courteous (like convincing them to let you cut in line for example) ... not that I do that sort of stuff....
5. Feeling kicks and wiggles and watching my belly wave like the ocean
6. My hubby and kids getting to feel and watch the baby move... and the excitement it creates in Lilia in particular
7. Not feeling so guilty about sleeping in until noon :) (or taking naps mid-day while one kid sleeps and the other is at school)
8. Looking at cute baby clothes!
9. Imagining tiny little fingers and toes and fuzzy heads and cute little cheeks that I'll one day get to snuggle with :)
10. Nesting instincts. I get sooo much more accomplished when these hit!
11. Always getting dibs on using the bathroom first :)
12. Getting free upgrades on airplanes and in hotels
(didn't know about this, and won't ever need to worry about it...).
13. Not feeling like I should change out of my
yoga pants after 3 days of wearing them, just to go to the grocery store.
14. Having a built in heater during the winter.

The most ANNOYING things about pregnancy

1. weird dreams... like dreams that keep you wondering all day long why the heck you dreamed about that.
2. That in-between time when no one can really tell you're pregnant, but you feel very overly pregnant
3. The three people a week (average) who tell me I look like I am about to pop even though I still have 7 weeks left.
4. The two to three bathroom trips each night.
5. Sneezing with a full bladder.
6. My personal identity disappearing, and suddenly the only thing I'm known for is "being pregnant"
7. Going through more than one pair of underwear in a day... especially annoying when it's more than two... or three... or when I run out of underwear before laundry day comes.
8. Prenatal vitamins. gross. huge.
9. Acne worse than when I was in high school
10. Not being able to eat the cookie dough :( (or brownie mix)
11. Seatbelts
12. Acid Reflux ALL.THE.TIME.
13. Listening to random strangers tell stories about how "this one thing happened to my cousin's husband's best friend's pregnant wife...."
14. Ligament pain... All. The. Time.
15. People being overly cautious of me. Like suddenly it's not safe for me to stand on a chair to hang something on the wall...
16. Crying at everything. Like billboards. Or cell phone and toilet paper commercials. (And having major freak outs over minor things...)
17. Having the nesting urge but not being able (by doctors orders) to sweep, mop, or vacuum or lift anything heavy...
18. Not being able to look sideways while in an elevator or escalator without falling over.
19. Some of my favorite foods and smells are suddenly disgusting to me.
20. Only being able to take Tylenol for pain... because I might as well eat a Smartee (
21. Everybody suddenly seems to walk WAY too fast...
22. My butt hurts. Technically it's my pelvic bone. Either way, I hurt, down there, all the time.
23. Having a built in heater in the summer.
24. Excuse me while I go pee...again...

The most annoying things PEOPLE SAY.... *and my response (if I had the guts)

1. How are you feeling? *pregnant. fat. hungry. my butt hurts. i just peed my pants again. annoyed that you're the 50th person to ask me that today.your breath smells
2. You're having a boy. I can tell.
3. How are you feeling?
4. Are you sure you're not having twins? *Are you sure YOU are not pregnan?? 'cause you're looking awfully fat...
5. How are you feeling? *Like the next person to ask me this is gonna get kicked in the knee caps. Go take a shower.
6. You're barely even showing, in fact, you're smaller than last time. *Really? Is that why all my maternity clothes are TOO SMALL and my belly knocks things over as I walk through the stores, and everyone stares at me?
7. How are you feeling?
8. So was this planned? *seriously? Do I look 16 to you? Yes this was planned. And even if it wasn't- does it matter?
9. You look cuter in maternity clothes than you do in regular clothes. *Wow. Thanks. I'm not quite sure how to respond to this one.
10.Are you nervous about the pain during delivery?? *ummm... would YOU be nervous if you knew you had to push out an 8 pound turd? Yeah, I thought so.
11. Are you pregnant? *no. It's a bee sting.
12. Can I feel your belly? *ALWAY, I mean ALWAYS asked by a really nasty, creepy looking stranger in a check-out line at the store. (Note- it only bothers me when strangers ask- if I know you, ask away!)
13. How are you feeling?

The best (read: WORST) advice I have ever been given while pregnant
1. To cure morning sickness, drink a beer each morning. (RIIIGHT!)
2. Breastfeeding your daughter will make her a lesbian. (Um. Okay. What do I say to THAT?)
3. Baby needs to fit in with your routine, not the other way around. (To an extent I agree, but not with a newborn... I work my baby into our family routine over time.)
4. IBC Rootbeer brings your milk supply in. (what a crock)
5. You need to feed her solids! She is under nourished (my baby was 6 weeks old)
6. It's okay to skip a meal a day to keep your weight down.
7. Stop taking your pain meds (right after birth) or else your baby won't wake up to eat. (Not true- that baby WILL wake up when hungry enough. Take advantage of the sleepy baby while you can!)

Hope you all have a fantastic day!

6 comments:

Sariah in Vancouver said...

These are awesome lists! lol

Btw, how are you feeling? ;)

Sissy Jackson said...

You are so cute Pam. Just want to spray you all over my kitchen!

Amber said...

You are so funny. I need your email again. Honestly this time I will invite you to my blog :)

Amber said...

oh, I guess you need this:
aalee38@wmconnect.com

Amber

M,W, and CJ said...

I'm laughing and laughing and I keep interrupting mike's tv show to tell him funny things off the list. I especially love the "sneezing with a full bladder" and "my butt hurts" on the annoying list. LOVED them all. ok, ok, I also love the "belly waving like the ocean" too. So much fun. Frankly, pregnancy is pretty cool huh?

Ben and Heidi said...

This is great thanks for sharing